Friday, January 9, 2009

Being Delores Lee Ellis II

"On My Journey Home"

I chose the rocky road in life leading me home to the fold. Feeling quite suddenly all alone I could not the distance see. I'll just travel step by step and take it patiently. I lift my eyes towards the distant plain, a traveler there to see. Focusing my eyes I looked over the moor, that face I've seen before.

I said, "Oh, Shepherd, is that you who left me all alone?" His sweet voice said, "Child take my hand; you're a mighty long way from home. I'll guide you there. I know these plains, though rocky they may be and with each faltering step you'd take my strength shall support thee.

I want to let you know dear one before you take my hand there will be grassy plains alright, but often sinking sands. Dark great mountains rough, and steep that ere you'll fear to climb. I only ask of you my child just keep your hand in mine. Sure there'll be glimmers along the way all pointing to the fold of temporal lights to ease your plight before you reach your goal.

Again, I ask of you comrade just keep your trust in me and side by side we'll journey on for better roads we'll see. I felt my burden had met defeat as the Shepherd walked with me. He spoke in such assuring way, his voice low and sweet.

We traveled onward homeward bound the path seemed harder to stride, he said, "Hold fast and press your way you'll make it if you try." I said, "Oh, Shepherd, you are the door, the way, the truth, the light, there's nothing else for me to do, but continue in this flight.

My feet were weary at this point. I longed so much to rest. I'm sure he sensed my agony. He said, "I'll give thee rest." I wanted more to understand just what he meant by rest, for as for my own point of view to stop here would be best.

I spoke to myself in psalms and hymns contended henceforth to wait, pressing my way for the Shepherd's sake until I reached the sheepfold gate. I felt strong firmer clasp as the traveler held my hand then just as he had warned before we'd reach the sinking sands.

I was overwhelmed quite suddenly by the Shepherd's amazing strength. I relaxed myself and felt at ease in wonderfully safe defense. I have no fear, for now I know I'll never be left alone as long as I heed the Shepherd's voice and his path my choice.

--Delores Lee Ellis

(My mother wrote this poem some 40 years ago. Often times I would awake in the wee hours of the morning on the way to the bathroom. Passing her cracked door, I would find her writing with a large suitcase on her bed which during daylight was lodged underneath. This is where she kept her poems. I never disturbed her.)


dave wheeler said...

Judith, one part of the reason I had not commented on your earlier post about your Mother on her birthday was I have been dealing with a few "issues". These are things that are important, but of which I feel I have little control or influence.

In reading this poem I came across the words "Again, I ask of you comrade just keep your trust in me and side by side we'll journey on for better roads we'll see. I felt my burden had met defeat as the shepherd walked with me." For some reason, those words made me realize that far better roads do lie ahead. While the burden was not quite defeated (as yet) it sure felt much lighter!

Many thanks to both Ms. Delores Ellis and her most marvelous daughter for the lesson in life. You both are the best!

judith ellis said...

Dave - I had the same response while reading those lines. My mother was a woman of great faith but she was also a realist.

There was never the sense from my mother of avoiding reality; but she completely and utterly believed in the undying love of the Shepherd for each of us no matter our faith, shortcomings, choices, or lack of faith.

This statement of love reminds of a song found in hymnals that my paternal great grandfather wrote, "I am the Good Shepherd." Inspirational song.

Thanks, Dave, for your encouraging words; they always matter.

Cynthia said...

Beautifully healing words, soothing words, words to take one
out of herself into the spiritual
where trust and faith will grant
you serenity.
Thank you so much for sharing this
exceptional prayer by your Mother,

judith ellis said...

Thank you, dear poet. I am most happy to share it. Her faith sustained her.